For junior Oliver Koogler, name struggles haven’t been about mispronunciation or misspelling; it’s been about the wrong name. Koogler was not born Oliver but now identifies as male and goes by his new name. 

“Technically I guess I am trans, but I mostly identify as just male,” Koogler said. “I don’t like sharing my birth name, but when I get called it, it feels really, really horrible, so I don’t say it out loud. You just kind of already have to know. A lot of teachers have been really good about it; I haven’t really been called my dead name unless [the person doesn’t] know.”

Last year, Koogler chose the name Joseph because it was closer to his birth name, and he wanted to make it easier for others to make the change. 

“It’s really important. Even if you don’t know the person, you should try even better than your best to use the correct names and pronouns because it really does make a huge difference,”                                                 – Junior Oliver Koogler said. 

“I hated it because it was really close to my dead name and it just didn’t sound good. It made me kind of upset. I changed it [to Oliver] and I’ve gotten a lot of feedback [that] it fits better; it’s more [me]. I don’t really care about feedback, as long as it’s what makes me feel better,” Koogler said. 

Koogler settled on Oliver based on multiple factors.

“At the time I was reading ‘Oliver Twist,’ and I really liked the character. I [also] found out that Oliver was one of the names my mom was thinking about for my little brother and I,” Koogler said. 

When Koogler decided to change his name, his mother was initially unsure of what to do but has since embraced her son.

“My mom was at first, as most parents in the situation do, like ‘is this really happening’ about it. Now she is by far my biggest supporter. She’s my biggest advocate. This year [she] volunteered to help out at the Pride Festival. She’s found different resources for me; she’s gotten me binders. She takes me to events and she’s just super supportive,” Koogler said.

“She wasn’t against it at all at first, she just kind of felt like she was losing a daughter. When she realized that she never had a daughter and her son isn’t dead, it made me feel really good that she put those thoughts aside and [accepted that I’m] her son. [She] would do anything for [me] as a mother should. It made me feel a lot better, [because] it’s who I am.”

Now, Koogler supports others going through what he did and advocates for using correct names and pronouns because of the difference it makes in people’s lives. 

“People should really take into consideration how much being misgendered and dead-named really affects people, and how much support prevents suicide. Suicide rates of trans teens whose parents don’t support them are [much less than] suicide rates for trans teens who do get support,” Koogler said. “It’s really important. Even if you don’t know the person, you should try even better than your best to use the correct names and pronouns because it really does make a huge difference.”